It’s good to be able to share a glimpse of our heart with friends, but to really open up and share the deep things of our hearts is confined to only a small few.
There have been times where I’ve been torn as to whether I should share certain things with someone. I hate gossip and slander, with a passion! Not that I haven’t caught myself doing it, followed by the desire to shower repeatedly after and maybe be sick a little. If I find out someone has been talking about me or my life without me, I immediately loose trust. There is absolutely no reason to discuss the details of someone else’s life unless those details are directly impacting us. I want to be a safe person for my friends, I want to be a safe person in general because I need safe people who can be trusted around me. I’ll never forget a couple years ago when I was with my dear friend M and I had shared something with her and a few moments after finishing I followed up with “Oh… can you please not say anything to anyone about this,” to which she replied “oh my gosh, I am so sorry that you felt you even had to ask that. of course I would never say anything to anyone.”
At that moment I felt covered and protected, safe and free. A couple months ago I was talking with another friend specifically about learning where to draw boundaries when sharing things with guys because that is a different dynamic than girlfriends. Because of my own personal issues I had a great hesitance to open up though I felt a safety to. She said simply (rough paraphrase), “the minute you feel uncovered and not completely safe, don’t say any more.”
As I’ve been on this beautiful and hard, new and deep, enriching and challenging journey of learning to live from the heart and living fully in the present, I’ve found that sharing our lives and hearts is absolutely crucial but sharing them with the right people is also vital!
There have been times when I’ve shared things in my heart with girlfriends because I enjoy their company and I like who they are but not because I felt I was really supposed to, but more because I wanted to share something of my life with them. I’m still not quite sure how to navigate that, I’m definitely a work in progress. There are other times where I know I’m supposed to share with people certain things but it’s not easy and I tread carefully and prayerfully.
We only have one heart, and living from it is both life-giving and so enriching but also requires attention and energy and care and our hearts should be cared for as God sees them, precious and the source of life.
I was listening to this man earlier this week and his words have stuck with me continually “foundational to the Kingdom of God is receiving love and giving it away.” Being attentive not to our natural instincts but that quiet urge that we know is God, showing us who and when to open up to, I think we will find more of God’s workings in us and our relationships. Makes me think of the scripture where Jesus says that “love covers,” and we should be loving one another from pure hearts as God’s children and making one another feel covered with love.
Mary treasured all these things, pondering them in her heart. Luke 2:19